Big Decisions

So, for as long as I can remember, I have wanted to be a stay at home mom.  I have always valued the sacrifices that it takes to have a stay at home mom, and I believe that no one will care for your child the same way that you will.  I also know that it is not always possible for that to happen.

David and I have been really struggling for the last 3 years.  He has been struggling to find consistent work in his field, and I have been struggling with my desires to work part time or not at all and the conviction that I could be and should be doing more for my family financially.

Then it hit me.

Someone at church said that because of the nature of escrow, his mom had been in and out of work for the last 17 years.

A good friend made a fleeting mention of David being a stay at home dad.

And he would be a good one.  To be honest, he probably does better housework than I do.  He loves and plays with our daughter.  He is great with infants.  And he has never gone to school.

This could be our chance.

Sure, I don't want to give up my dreams of raising my children from birth, day in and day out.  Sure, he doesn't want to give up the idea of working full time.  But it seems so clear.  So. Very. Clear.  I can support our family.  He can get his bachelor's degree and special ed teaching credential (a job he would be a rock star at, a job that is stable, and a job that has summer off and a good retirement).  In the 8 year time period that that would take (part time student)  our children would have a stay at home parent.

Problem solved.

Except now I have to get my heart in the right place.  So does he.  But God is working.  God is faithful.  And this all just makes sense.

Tina

Family can be a blessing.  Family can be difficult.  Found family, however, is different because it has been chosen, and because it fits just right.

Tomorrow, we lose our Tina, our grandma Tina.  She goes back to Denmark.  She goes back to her family, her son, her mother, her brother and niece.

She is the grandma that my mom would have been.  And that warms my heart. 

I will miss her.

Penelope will miss her.

We won't see her for at least a couple of years.  But no matter.  We have had her here, and will always have her in our hearts.